The balancing act

In a surprising move, I managed to get out of bed on Thursday and go into uni and even managed to be semi-productive. I gave myself the goal to work til 3pm, but the thought of going home and mooching was so depressing I managed to work until 6pm. And then I did the whole thing again on Friday and then again on Saturday.

I’m relieved to say things aren’t looking nearly as bleak as they did a mere four days ago. There is definitely a seductive quality about sitting at your desk and working and pretending that there is no chaos going on in your head. Although, it did manage to seep through at times, and I found myself just sitting, staring at the screen and it took a gargantuan amount of self control to keep going and not curl up under my desk and take a long nap.

I am aware of the fine line I am treading between doing productive work and doing productive work to avoid ‘real life’. It’s a struggle I’ve had for a long time now and I am genuinely puzzled by those fellow students that manage to balance it all. There is one practically brilliant grad student, who is literally the poster-child of the psychology department. He is constantly being showered in accolades, and is often the subject of departmental emails congratulating him on his most recent success. The point of mentioning poster-child is that he is normal. He comes in late, laughs and fools around and, by the sounds of it (is it my fault I overhear him on the phone?!), has a pretty active social life. How does he do it??